High status BS

Johnnie Moore

I’m Johnnie Moore, and I help people work better together

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Branding is so often mired in the Land of High Status. Why, oh why, are agencies so grandiose in the way they describe their clients and themselves?

The other day, I picked up the promotional brochure of Incepta Marketing Intelligence, entitled “Demystifying Solutions”. Here are few fairly representative highlights. The italics and the blahs and rhubarbs are mine; the ludicrously smug self-congratulation is entirely their own.

Imagine an agency whose passion for knowledge extends far beyond the boundaries of research; a broader perspective informing every aspect of our work.

A vibrant mix of science and art; qualitative and quantitative imagination… where busy imaginations are always working for your advantage… an agency that compounds creativity and practicality, delivers imaginative solutions…

No need to imagine. This what we do every day. And it works.

Named Marketing Agency of the Year blah blah via flagship agencies blah blah proven reputation rhubarb rhubarb truly actionable outcomes blah blah enviable track record rhubarb industry awards blah blah thought leaders rhubarb rhubarb clear deep thinking and a sharp sense of commercial reality blah incisive analysis rhubarb rhubarb blue chip clients blah blah

Words (almost) fail me. If you met a real person who introduced himself in such a laughably narcissistic fashion, I’m quite sure you’d fall over laughing. I can’t imagine such an organisation seeing anything much beyond its own reflection in the mirror of its vanity.

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