the value of allowing for doubt, fear, anxiety and anger
Transcript of this video:
In my book, I quote the writer and psychoanalyst Adam Phillips, who says that as humans we are constantly having to decide how much of our aliveness we can bear and how much we need to anaesthetise ourselves.
So I think what he’s talking about there is when we’re experiencing more difficult emotions of fear or doubt or anger, are we willing to acknowledge them to ourselves and to express them to others, or do we need to suppress them?
I think in our meetings, in teams and in groups, it’s very easy to stay in what I call polite collaboration where those more difficult feelings aren’t being expressed. And we feel like, on the surface anyway, we’re being very constructive.
And up to a point, I think that’s true. But I do think often in groups, they actually come to life only when someone is willing to give voice to doubt or anxiety or fear or anger.
And that’s for me when the meeting comes to life. And we just need to remember, we are not machines, we’re not computers. We are human beings. And as well as achieving our stated grownup goals, I think we need to pay attention to whether as groups we are actually bearing our aliveness well together or simply anaesthetising ourselves.
Photo by Max Leveridge on Unsplash
